july 8 2016
you faced it, she cheated, and you knew for a long time. She still love, you still love her, you still want the project.
you are now starting a new relationship with her, and you will remarry this summer. You choose love.
Of course you are accepting that you and her are not perfect and also polyamorous. You face it, she hardly start to understand.
most of her trichery because she was dump, though she is still. She still love you. And about to get really hurt for you.

you were setting unachievable relationship goal.
-dont even get close to cheating
-dont ever lie to me
-dont get emotional with someone else
-dont get physical with anybody
-dont get to close to male friend
and you failed all

I failed too
i already stoped expecting thaqt kind of fidelity.
and i also stop giving myself that rigor
so often i distanced myself from friendship, maybe some love. and i feel like i need to open myself. not necessary cheating. but letting myself be happy.
I dont want to be anxious anymore.
i dont want to be destroyed because sometime she get slutty.
for now on, you will set the boundary. reask her to marry you and begin on this base.

you fucked you ex while pregnant.
you flirted with boys.
you opened love site account
you lied to me to see you crush

for the first you were thinking that i had an affair and you got revebgw you dumb bitch
the other were just friend
the love site account. you were twlling its only for friend ship. i opened some in front of you and you stoped
for the last you were pissed off of family.

@2016-08-02
i drew a connection between the end of myelle justin relationship and suddent increase of sex quality with myelle.
she started to kiss me like julie. she knew i liked that for years. but she didnt so i let go.
but now i have a more life filling sex. i definitely got advantage of her infidelity.
this let the possibility that they kissed at least once . or maybe he other thing.
you have proof that she is a lyer. she will lie if she think ill quit her.
it is a compersion challenge. see it as she scored and you got a fetish granted with intense frwnch kiss.
i know her limerence took end when he hook a young chineese girl. proof he as seduction skill on mannipulation.
you pledged to beleave her. that mean act upon her lie. dont forget to protect yourself.

@2016-08-22
I learned more from what happend with Phil.
She said to herself, one last time and then ill be loyal. romantic but i didnt accept that compromise. I wouldnt had started a familly with such compromise.
I felt tricked into a marriage with lie.
Last weekend i treated you of "conne" and "salope" and i didnt retracted my word
I asked to end all contact with phil and she did. 
I blamed her for not doing it in first place, i told her that i was completly unrespectfull to bring him home again and let me befriend him.
I became really violent with my word. at the end i was looking at her shaking of emotion. I felt like shit.
I know she didnt fuck anyboady since 12 years. She became emotionnaly infidel but did the right choice.
I hurted her a lot and I betrayed some promise written in the UsBook.
It was saturday. Yesterday i said that i love her without condition. I prayed for the force to forgive.
I still think i want to cheat. And i love myelle so much that it hurt.
I know now you are ALL into me. And i take your acceptance of rejecting your hold friend is a prrof of your commitment.