while at school. you didnt privileged your relation.
many time you choosed to build your relation at school instead of returning helping myelle with kids.
ahe felt so much alone. in the end last school session mixed with job. she clinched.
and offered herself good time she though she deserved from me. 
he was attentive. he was an asshole. but you were not putting her in front.

she wouldnt go as far as exchanging body fluid or kiss. but the flirt you didnt do he did to her.
you are upset that she allowed herself that fobiden pleasure.
remember what you are doing with elyse. and while writing this. you are still going forward with her.

remember that you love her. and she still love you.
she need to be flirted. and you love to flirt.
do it as much as you can.

and dont forget to allow yourself that pleasure.

@2016-08-31
She is still hystericaly bonded.
She tryed to lie to me in the begining like she was not herself, she dont remember.
She finally told me it was because of school, and my absence. She didnt really complained at all.
She then told she didnt think she was the woman of my life. How dumb she is.
she tell me she was feeling guilty, but it was a lie. I couldnt even make my point. I couldnt even complain. She was against me.
She chosen him over me for months. She made me accept her flirt by force, until i stop caring.
And then she returned to me. I enjoyed. but inside i was completely broken.
She just start to understand what she did.and now she is doing everything to not loose me.
While i stayed, not like if i have somewhere to go. but i had no intention of going away from kids. She lost me. 
I though for an entire year that she did not love me anymore and it killed me inside.
Now she want me back like it was. but i told her i will never be the same.
I still love her. but i dont expect her loyalty anymore. And I dont offer it either.
I consider myself as a cuck because of her, and i will turn that page by cheating her.
I will cheat even if it hurt me
I will cheat even if I dont want her to suffer
I will cheat because she cucked me and lied for more than 10 years
I will cheat because the asshole who fucked was at our wedding
I will cheat because she didnt acknowledge my feeling about it for more than 10 years
I will cheat because she though she had the right to do it. then she gave me the right to do it too.
I will cheat because I , at several moment, backed off girl friend because of her jealousy. but she didnt for me.
I will cheat because i prefere to be a cheater than a cuck.
I will cheat because i like to flirt too. I like sex, I like woman.